Tag Archives: I suck at social things

The art of the email

To my boss:

Dear [Boss],

My friend is coming into town and because I haven’t seen her in a long time, if it’s okay with you, I would like to have [specific upcoming] Friday off. Also, I have a dentist appointment that day, and it would just be easier if I didn’t have to come into the office. If it’s inconvenient to you, I could make up work hours during upcoming lunch periods or stay late or something.

Sincerely, Thanks!


To new friend/aquaintance:

Dear [Friendish Person], Hey! Hi There! Howdy! Yo!

[open with joke] How’s it going? What’s happening? Hey, it’s Lisa from [thing we have in common].

So, remember when we talked about [thing] and how we mutually wanted to do it/go to it? Remember [thing]? I was wondering if you still wanted to do [thing]? Still up for [thing]? If not, that’s totally cool! I’m totally in if you are.

[gentle ribbing based on something I know about person] [close with joke] Oh yeah! Hope you had a blast at your grandma’s funeral! [close with Simpsons quote that no one will get]

Love Sincerely Best Thanks

[Nickname they didn’t give me] Lisa


Hey slutbag,

Wanna go to the thing tonight? Word.

Other slutbag (me)